The rumble of ominous thunder announces the pending approach.
A lingering, menacing spectre, taking hold and squeezing your throat.
You foolishly think you have time to prepare for your terrible fate
But your countermeasures are no match, and anyway you’ve left them too late.
With sudden ferocity it’s on you – your intellect can’t help you now.
You struggle to maintain perspective, but while drowning you can’t figure how.
It hits you with force, a hundred foot wave, delivering a great crushing blow
Sucking your breath, breaking your thoughts, a rushing adrenaline flow.
Once hit you are shaken, your muscles weak, the trembling spreads like a vine
Wrapped in its tendrils, kidnapping your will, distorting and disrupting time.
It takes hold of your throat, in a strangling grip, till you find you barely can swallow.
Your heart tries escaping, right out from your chest, your lungs feel like they might follow.
You wonder if everyone’s looking, thinking “What’s wrong with them, are they ill?”
You hope you just might, with tremendous effort, find a way to appear at least still.
And during this hell, which can drag on all day, or all week if you’re in quite a state
Nobody around you has the slightest damn clue what an effort it takes to seem straight.
With each passing moment, you wonder if now you’ll just vomit all over your shoes
But somehow you stay upright, even though you’re on fire, you rely on your will to get through.
It’s not that uncommon, in the midst of this angst, to be dripping with sweat from your brow
And your mind will do thought-loops, thrashing over itself, you’ll wish it would just settle down.
If you’ve not felt anxiety, hear it from me, this is not something upon you I’d wish.
I could never imagine, before I first had one, how horrific a panic attack is.
So if someone you know has told you before, this is something they deal with in life
Don’t think them weak, for their strength is enormous, as it need be to deal with this strife.
- I’m no Superman… (codenix | blog)
- When your mind defects… (codenix | blog)
- On Public Displays of Vulnerability (codenix | blog)
- Value (codenix | blog)